CROCKED Dancing On Ice star Bez has revealed he once rioted in prison because there wasn’t enough trifle.
The former Happy Mondays icon – real name Mark Berry – was jailed at the age of 17 after becoming homeless and spent more than three years in prison.
Bez is currently taking part in Dancing On Ice, but has Covid at the momentCredit: Rex
Bez was in jail for three years when he was just 17Credit: Getty
He served a term at a youth detention centre and was later sent to HMP Hindley in Bickershaw, Greater Manchester.
He got into fights, riots and even smuggled cigarettes while he was in prison.
The Happy Mondays singer – who is isolating with Covid – revealed all in his book Freaky Dancing: Me and The Monday’s.
Bez spent most of his time in prison working in a concrete shop or playing for the football team, but says sometimes he got involved in trouble to break the monotonous routine.
Once, the 57-year-old was punished with an extra six months added on to his sentence for actively being involved in a riot situation over a dessert.
The percussionist penned that it was every man for himself before adding: “The following day we were ordered to write down the reasons for the riot. Every man wrote that the reason for the riot was because we hadn’t enough trifle the previous Sunday.
“The next Sunday, there were extra big helpings of trifle for everyone to keep us happy. F**cking ace! The things a lad has to do to get his fair share of trifle, it’s astounding.”
On another occasion, the father-of-three explained how he had been at a new prison for less than an hour before he found himself in a fight.
Bez says he was approached by an Irish man who thought he would be an easy target pushover: “This Irish kid took one look at me and went to grab my fork as a ruse to see if he could get me at it or I’d be an easy pushover.
“No chance, I’m not having it I thought and instantly poked him in the eye, lashed out with a headbutt and followed it up with a few good shots while he was off balance.”
But not all days were filled with something to take Bez’s mind of his mental health.
The Boltonian said: “As you can imagine, time drags by very slowly in a place like that. It’s a constant battle of wits to keep on top of things and not slip into a deep depression.
“There were some nasty incidents of extreme violence that plagued the thoughts of every man in there.”
When Bez wasn’t sleeping all day or going to church on Sunday’s, he found amusement in competing with other inmates to see who could find the most foolproof way of smuggling cigarettes in.
Being put on the admin cleaning duties meant Bez “discovered the best way to get contraband in” despite the no smoking rule.
The ‘step on’ singer explained: “I was on to a winner, having full access to the visitors’ toilets meant I could get the cigs dropped off in the towel roll holder and simply collected the stash as I went about my day.”
When the TV star eventually got out, he promised himself he would never go back and since has been true to his word.
Bez said how in his book he missed a lot of the more gruesome details of life inside Strangeways Prison, Manchester, out.
He explained: “I simply couldn’t face going into it all and opening up the can of worms that I’ve managed to keep shut tight for the last fifteen years.
“It makes me feel physically sick with depression just thinking about that period of my life.”
The star rose to fame in Happy MondaysCredit: Getty
Bez will be back on the ice next week – he currently has CovidCredit: ITV